How I will get $1,000,000

In todays political climate, and I don't mean the environment surrounding power and decision making, I mean the politics in weather and science, you can never be to safe or sure of what is going on.

First we had global warming, in which all the pollution we are letting off as humans is causing the global temperatures to rise. By the way, congrats on the Nobel former next president of the U.S. Al Gore. Now we are having global cooling, in which the earth is recording it's coldest winters over the past couple years. Now this is caused by pollution, once again, blocking the sun's rays so the earth's surface is not warming up. Personally if I had my choice I would go with global cooling. I can't stand the heat and it's easier to get warm than it is to get cool.

Well, now there is a third theory. And it is my own, and will make me millions. Ready? We are now suffering from what will be known as GLOBAL NORMALING (to be said with a loud echo). This states the earth's global temperature has never fluctuated this normal in the last trillion years (estimate). We have never seen temperature change the same way every year so much. This is causing people to let pollution off into the air all willy nilly, causing it to be gross and hard to breathe in. Global normaling is believed to be caused by living on earth, a dynamic planet, which is located in a dynamic solar system, which is located in a dynamic galaxy.

In summation, I will take all sorts of praise and my $1,000,000 in tens, twentys, and a couple hundreds (they look cool).